I need tech support just to back out of the driveway

By Fay Jacobs | Illustration by Rob Waters
From the Holiday 2019 issue


I’ve got a new car. Well, it’s new to me. It’s a 6-year-old SUV with a dashboard like a cockpit. My trade-in still had a cassette player in it, so you can imagine the culture shock.

In fact, I’m so old I remember when all you needed to know when buying a car was how to drive. Now you need a degree from MIT.



Meet Bob, the well-traveled supersized bovine who found a home near Dagsboro

By Bill Newcott
From the Holiday 2019 issue


Something about tourist towns seems to inspire the oddest of oddball business attractions.

When I lived in L.A., my favorite doughnut shop was in the shape of a giant doughnut. In Florida I entered an alligator farm by walking into the mouth of an enormous ’gator. Atlantic City has the legendary Lucy, a six-story landmark in the shape of an elephant.

For a while I thought coastal Delaware might be an exception. Sure, there’s the flying white baby grand piano atop the Keyboard America sign along Coastal Highway. And the retired crop-dusting plane posted above Midway Speedway. And then there’s that swooping Huey helicopter behind the fence of Bethany Beach’s National Guard training site. (Here’s a joke I just made up: Heading north from Bethany you can visit Huey, Dewey, and Louie’s Pizza.)



When your husband floats one proposal after another, it’s best to step aboard and enjoy the lifelong cruise

By Lynn Massey  |  Photographs by Carolyn Watson
From the Holiday 2019 issue


When I married Grant Massey 43 years ago, I was never afraid of becoming a golf widow, but I didn’t know I was destined to be a boatwright widow.

I suppose I should have had suspicions when he and his family spoke so lovingly of the 8-foot pram, the Gumdrop, that Grant built when just 12 years old. Even though he did most of the work on the Douglas fir plywood boat, the whole family was involved. At the Kanawha County Public Library in Charleston, W.Va., his father found a reference to the plans, which they were able to acquire by mail. His two older sisters helped find materials and his Grandpa Massey helped with the construction. His mother paid him for odd jobs, which helped him raise the $50 he needed for the whole project.